October 25, 2002
October 25, 2002


Today, the cultural dictates are allowing kids as young as 10 years old to have sex according to the May 27, 2002, U.S. NEWS AND WORLD REPORT articles on teenís sex. No matter what the age, indulging in sex before knowing an individual is a recipe for heartbreak. The younger the persons are the greater the lasting emotional costs. We usually concentrate on the physical reasons of STDíS and pregnancy which often donít deter children. Children change as they grow, but their development is at a faster pace than when fully matured. Adults also alter as circumstances change. No matter what the relationship was previous to intercourse, is not what it will be after the intimacy. In the case of children, the male often becomes more aggressive and impatient, more demanding of what he feels his sexual rights are. Young women, often become sex slaves in order to maintain a connection with the male and with the group.

Besides, the known effects of pregnancy, and STDíS, the infant females lose the most important part of their lives, their independence and self confidence. They become the walking sexual puppets of the other gender. Therefore establishing a new generation of couples who will need counseling even more than those of today.

Even, marriageable women of all ages need to abstain from copulation so that their judgment is not clouded by their hormones. Intercourse, frequently changes the womenís attitude by creating a bonding that includes a loyalty that she may or may not receive in return. More importantly choosing on the basis of a physical attraction is the worst determiner of a relationship. One needs to be friends, have a person who is flexible, communicates and handles money well, has control over his/her emotions, be sanitary and clean (different concepts Iíve found), and have interests in common (just to name a few). Each person may have different goals and desires of what they would want in a relationship and therefore each individual should prepare a list and mentally decide whether the other has the attributes of which they are looking. These relationships are difficult enough for adults to deal with the mourning effects of the break up of relationships and its after effects of loss of confidence, and sadness.

Many men and women attend counseling because of the devastation it causes in their lives. Children are ill equipped with the experience necessary, nor do they have the physical, mental, or financial resources available to deal with such a major traumatic event.

Therefore I suggest that parents include in their sex teachings the relationship aspect of life. Why not point to your own disintegrating marriage or if that is going well, those of relatives or neighbors. Explain a time in your life where your heart was broken, but more importantly that childhood is a time for learning how to avoid mishaps as much as possible so that life does not drag them into an oblivion. We learn best when our emotions are activated which is why TV is a great teacher, be it good or bad. Screen what they are watching. Ask them how they perceived what they saw. Donít assume that they analyzed it in the same way as you did. A positive content might be interpreted in just the opposite mode. Experience helps us to assess situations properly. That is exactly what a youthful mind lacks. Help fill in the blanks.

Ask yourself if their need for closeness is not supplied by the parents?
Damaged citizens make an unstable society.
The future of America is waiting.