March 1, 2017
March 1, 2017


This article is only for the group of people who are unable to let go of a love relationship that is no longer loving, therefore: has become dangerous or poisonous to themselves.

It becomes a love hate relationship. The individual can neither leave the relationship nor tolerate it. Exploring why this will happen and how to release oneself from it, is suggested below:

Dr. Daniel Amen has performed a brain SPECT Scan on a person who is "IN LOVE". The scan mimicked the pattern of a person who is on cocaine.

The attachment is now understandable since "In Love" individuals have an addiction which has become a compulsive relationship.

The body’s chemically induced bonding develops into a herculean struggle. Now the body is dealing with mourning activities for ending the commitment. Those mourning emotions are akin to grieving for a loved one. Yet there is no funeral; therefore, no closure.

Since grieving is also an emotion which the brain emits as neurotransmitters (chemicals called hormones) the brain is flooded with opposing reactions. The grief stricken person also has to LET GO.

Just choosing to overcome and forget the allegiance is a battle. Unfortunately some people lose the war and forever mourn the loved one. For divorcees who wish to become disengaged the progress becomes akin to a roller coster ride. One minute one is ecstatic and the next minute one feels almost suicidal. (The term divorcees is used in a very loose context here. It signifies any termination of any romantic alliance).

In order to overcome these brain determined emotions recognizing the source of the agonizing decision to leave is the first step towards progress. Giving oneself permission to feel the mixed emotional messages is the next rung of the ladder. Now permission must be granted by oneself to return to happiness.

Do not allow yourself to wallow in the cesspool of grief, sorrow, anger resentment and/or rage. Remind yourself of the consequences of giving way to your raging emotions. Doing so will only further the real consequences of your actions such as jail time, loss of your other loved ones and so forth.