March 14, 2008

Team Work
Marriage is a team project. Yet I hear: (fill in “parents”, “Family”. “siblings” , “spouse”, which ever applies) S/he told me I had to (Pick one or more which applies) stay with the spouse, stop spending money, restrict your friendships, restrict your travel etc. Anytime one adult is dictating to another adult in a marital situation, the unity is destroyed and ultimately the marriage is dissolved.

Yet all issues can be resolved with good communication skills.

The difference between one person being the “boss” and demanding compliance and the other with willing co-operation is evident in the political analogy that we see daily on TV. Hillary Clinton is the “I” (translates into boss) will do it verses Barack Obama who states “We” will do it. If you haven’t been following, turn on your TV sets.

Obama has thousands of people cheering for him because he includes them in the process. Marital team work is important not just because it includes both parties in the decision making with all issues: child raising, finances, expenditure choices and so forth. It is important because the individual left out feels a loss of self esteem, unloved, unworthy, and depressed. This often leads to dire consequences of: drugs, alcohol, gambling, affairs, overeating, and even workaholism.

Obama models effective communication skills even if he may or may not be voted in as President. We can learn by observing how he skilfully unifies all races, genders, age groups, and diverse classes as one.

Learn how to communicate effectively. Many of my former articles are on communication skills. Go to www.fawcettcounseling.com/ and click on THE SOUND OBSERVER columns.