April 5, 2019
April 5, 2019
Jumping to Conclusions
What we see or hear are not always what they at first appear to be.
Take the photo of Biden leaning forward in back of a woman's head. The lady asserted that he was comforting her because he was aware that she was anxious over dealing with a new event for her. She welcomed the kindness.
Facebook picked it up and transformed Biden's face into a lecherous look which was not his appearance in the original photo.
A wife overhears a comment made to a young woman that appears to be intimate in content. Yet the man was trying to deter the female away from a drug dealer and instead go on his suggested path of redemption.
Certainly in this culture today the emphasis on sex, glamor, and attractive body parts has lured the perception towards only one conclusion.
In some cases that conclusion is correct. However, to make a determination before all the facts are in, creates additional discord and major problems in relationships.
To decide facts from the first thought that pops into ones head, creates a suspicious tone that forfeits the individual's ability to feel comfortable in relating the facts that already have been prejudiced.
The prejudgment disallows any further discussion and blatantly denies the truth of the matter.
Think of a situation in your life where you meant no harm or had not the intention that another person subscribes to it.
I can think several. On the one that comes to mind is a birth announcement of my first born boy sent to my sister and an identical one also sent to my parents. My sister was residing in my parents residence at that time. My parents received the birth announcement, but my sister did not. She refused to believe me that I had sent them out at the same time and spurned me.
I had run out of the original ones so I purchased another and sent it to her.
She still refused to believe that I had sent the original one until several months later, the first announcement arrived which was identical to the one I sent my mother and father.
I see this type of scenario ruin perfectly good marriages over accusations of being interested in another woman/man. Both genders jump to conclusions and often refuse to hear the context in which the conversation took place.
By the time that the partner finally believes the truth, the relationship is still damaged.
The person accused feels that there was a lack of trust on the mates side. There is another emotional reaction to those accusations. The individual realizes that the supposed ally was unable to view the person as s/he is and always has been which causes unwelcome and detrimental effects so as to impair the previous value of the relationship.
In the future, when the loved one is late arriving home; stop the first thought that s/he might be having an affair. Instead, ask if there was heavy traffic, an accident, or some other reason that the person was delayed. Ask with sincerity and lose that suspicious tone and thought.
If, your first impression proves to be correct, it will become apparent soon enough. Still proceed with the evidence and make certain that your facts are correct.