May 23, 2017
May 23, 2017
According to the research in the June issue of National Geographic; everybody does and frequently. Their extensive research shows that during the teen years we lie more than at any other time (59%), followed by the 18 to 44 age group which tells lies 45% of time, the 9-12 age group lies 43% of the time, the 45-59 age group tells lies 39% of the time, the 60-77 age group lies 39% of the time. The most honest group is 6-8 years of age and they tell lies 29% of the time. These percentages were developed by asking participants to keep track of how often they have lied during a weeks time.
We can all identify with our lies to save someone's feelings. "Do you like my dress?" rather than say, "No," you find yourself lying, "It is beautiful!" I have gotten around that question by saying, "The most important thing is that you like it." If I am pressed on the issue, I try to stress that my opinion is unimportant and that one should enjoy what they wear because they like it. Sometimes the speaker refuses to allow herself that entitlement and forces me to skirt lying by saying, "It is not my style, but everyone has a different style." It can be very difficult to not take the easy route to lie and say, "Yes that is lovely."
You are busy and your wife asks you to take out the garbage immediately, You graciously do it rather than have an argument, but you are annoyed that it has to be done explicitly when she wants it done and not in your time frame.
You have been invited to a boring event and do not wish to go. You fib and state that you would love to go but, you have something else scheduled in that time.
You scrapped the side of the car, but do not wish to admit that you are lacking driving skills so you say," When I came out of the store and found the car banged up in the parking lot, I was very angry at the perpetrator."
You are making out your income tax and flub a few amounts.
You have had an affair and admitting it you believe will end your marriage so you lie or just do not mention it. Actually, research had found that this type of lying is a huge mistake. Researchers discovered it is better to be truthful and take the chance that the spouse will accept. In that manner Trust is never lost. The marriage is much more likely to survive.
Even humor can be a form of lying. Truthful suppressed thoughts presented humorously are really a lie disguised as a joke.
Avoiding rudeness is another form of lying insisting that it did not hurt after a friend accidentally knocks into you.
There are times where we are perplexed by why we told an unnecessary lie. Usually if you ponder on it will come to you.
Then there is the vicious lie where you accuse someone else of wrong doing just because you dislike them.
Lastly there is the pathological liar who either ignores or disregards reality. A recent business/ politician who says one thing on tape for the entire world to see and then-even when reminded of the tape-claims he did not say it.
Scientists find those who lie the most have a higher IQ. It would appear that the effort to lie and remember the lies creates more activity in the brain which is helpful for the brain.
I will end this article with the fact that I saw a goose lying by making believe that one wing was injured in order to save its offspring. The goose even landed in front of an ongoing car because our cat was after it. I commanded our cat to stop and he skidded to a stop. Then much to our amazement the goose flew away with no impairment. We brought the cat in so that the bird would not have to go to such extremes to save her goslings.
So we are not the only animals that lie.
There is so much more information about lying in the June article which I recommend you read.
Post script: Today after I wrote this article I found there was another category of a lie which was not mentioned in the magazine's research. I found that I lied about the timing of my educational background because the general topic of today's culture under discussion would have become a personal dissertation about how I began my education as a 16 year old and did not begin to complete it until I was in my forties. Such was my reasoning to myself as I simplified my comment to her to appear to have completed my education in one compact time unit.