May 9, 2008

MISUNDERSTANDINGS
Today I received a call from a a gentleman that wanted to know if my Fear article meant that I was advocating affairs. My answer was: “Just the opposite.” Unfortunately, In condensing thoughts there can sometimes be misunderstandings. Let me clarify what I meant by Fear producing another “person”. The “person: of which I was referring to was an imaginary person born out of the fear that the loved one is cheating on the relationship. The Fear takes on a persona. This does not happen in every instance in marriage. This article was only for those people that are experiencing this paranoia.

I quote the line that the gentleman had a problem with: “It (fear) materializes itself so that it is more destructive than the reality, even if there were an affair it takes over more vividly than an actual human.” I believe this is where the misunderstanding of that gentleman took place. I am referring to couples who have erred with an affair and want to get beyond it by giving up the affair, but the fear does not let them go on to correct their relationship.

This explanation may not make sense to those who have not experienced this phenomena, but will be entirely clear to those who have walked in the horror of their fear. Be pleased if you are not understanding this unusual twist of human nature because it means you have not been touched by the wrenching hurt of it. Many of my articles are meant for a specific demography and those for whom it does not apply need only be pleased that you have not experienced it.