September 4, 2014
September 4, 2014
Fear Is Fatal
When bombs were falling during W.W.II Winston Churchill said, “There is nothing to fear except fear itself.”
He knew that fear would destroy England more than the enemies’ conflagration.
Fear creates distrust and obsessive worrying. The more that one loves, it seems, the more one becomes fearful of losing their partner. Therefore, this article is for those unfortunates that buy into the fear.
Both sexes can be guilty of this. Here are some examples:
“Where were you this morning?”
“Who called you?”
“Why did you delete calls from your phone? What are you hiding?”
“Why did it take you so long to get home?”
“I saw you talking (to the opposite sex). What were you saying?”
“What did you spend your money on?”
“Let me see your pay check.”
Fear creates a prison for the partner. We put people in prison for punishment. How long do you think a spouse will want to stay in prison. Do you not want your lover to love you freely and want to stay because of that love?
Do you really want someone that you have forced to stay with you?
If that person has really roamed. Leave that person. Do not stay and panic every time the person is late coming home. In most cases the traffic is the cause. On several occasions it has taken me anywhere from 4 to 10 hours to travel the distance from New York to my home. It should be a bit more than an hour trip for 60 miles. However, even on a good day , it is closer to 2 hours.
Go for counseling if you have anxieties that are creating augments or just distance between both of you.
In all likelihood your fears are groundless.
In the cases where they are real; find out the cause. Find a solution.
The solution can be you end the relationship.
Or the solution can be to fix the damaged parts so that the relationship can be enjoyed and lasting.
Obsessive Fear never solved anything. All it does is destroy.